You keep telling me that you're afraid of breaking my heart.
Well, here's the deal.
Been there. Done that.
Honestly, I've been broken enough times that it doesn't even scare me anymore. And I have just accepted that at some point, everyone you love is going to crush you.
We're at this point right now that neither of us knows what to do.
Do we proceed?
Do we break up?
So we're just stuck in this awkward middle-ground. I think that more than anything, this is what is making us so tentative.
I don't do things half way.
When I'm in, I'm in.
and I'm in.
I really do appreciate and love you so much for keeping my feelings in the back of your mind. But here's the thing, you have to stop worrying about what it's going to do to me. Stop worrying about how I'm going to react. Stop worrying about my feelings.
I know where I stand, and you know that I trust you. I trust you to do whatever it is that you think is in your best interest. I can take care of myself, I've done it enough times before.
I just don't want you to feel like you're settling with me.
Believe it or not, I really do want what is best for you, even if it means that I'm not in the picture.
You deserve the best.
I may not be the best, in fact, I know I'm not, but that's not what scares me.
I'm afraid that someday I'm going to regret it if I don't tell you exactly how I feel. I know I don't talk much, and that's because it's easier for me to write how I feel and show how I feel instead of actually saying how things really are.
Just know that I mean it when I tell you that I love you. I have all the confidence in the world in you and in whatever decision you decide to make. Regardless of how it ends, I'll have your back.
That's just how it works. That's what you do when you love someone.
So disregard my feelings. Put me aside and figure out what exactly it is that you want. Find what it is within yourself and realize that I'm going to back you up.
